Monday, May 30, 2011


Do not disturb the author....she is working on proofreading the next in our series. This is a reason for me to celebrate.

Green Embrace: Immortal Council series #6 is well on its way to being available to all of you. The last words written, the plot solid and full of, from what I have seen, spicy masturbation and sex. Seems the two women in this story were quite avidly self pleasuring on their journey to find each other. Of course when they were so far apart for so long, it makes sense.

"You obsess me, I want you to possess me."

This is the tag line and I'm sure the story delivers. From what I have seen, interacting with Ever and Selene, they are definitely obsessed with each other. How well they possess each other? That is a question the story will have to answer I suppose. My author has promised to let me read it, as usual, as soon as she sends it in to her editor.

Hopefully that will be tomorrow, and that is why I am making sure her life is remaining as quiet as possible this long weekend, so she can concentrate and finish.

So shhh...

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Happy Memorial Day!

It’s Memorial Day weekend! Time for fun in the sun, beach outings and BBQed anything. Family is somewhere on that list as well, though I like to keep my gatherings as small as possible.

Usually we’d drive to Coney Island, do the cotton candy and rides bit, all while visiting family—not mine, the SO’s—but this year we’re keeping it close to home. A get together for just the three of us—me, the Mr. and the kid. We’ll be doing the usual, burning something on the grill, playing crude dancehall music loud enough to annoy the neighbors, and just all around enjoy ourselves.

Yeah, we do it big.


I like it like that, you see. Small and intimate, where talking isn’t really necessary and when I do talk, I don’t have to watch my language. Relaxation is the name of the game for me. And I am far from relaxed when in the company of people who are not the people I live with.

Yeah, weird that way. As in many other ways.

Enjoy the long weekend—however and with whomever you spend it. And when you’re stuffed from all that eating and tired from all that dancing…and stuff, head on over to All Romance ebooks for 50% on all books site-wide. Here are two suggestions to start off your list J

A Wicked Ride 
Blindfold Me       Both available @ ARe!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

The Tantalizing Darkside - Wait Tornado???

We all know that the creatures of the night have pretty much taken over the universe as we know it. Vampires, witches, werewolves, wizards, zombies etc. The undead, and even the freakish, have always fascinated our human intellect from Shelley to Pattinson.

The Twilight phenomenon has banked on that, and is profiting greatly off of the sexy allure of the unnatural.

First it was Ohhh Edward… then it was CHOOSE, Edward or Jacob, vampire versus werewolf. Hard pick, I know, both actors and characters have their positives and negatives. I would like to look at it on a broader spectrum, species, versus species.

There is the vampire, chilling, sleek, dark, oozing sexual power. You look into their eyes and are mesmerized by the deep, brooding soulful depths. The struggle between the life and death of blood, eternal life and a ancient culture unchanged by the test of fate.

Next the mighty, burly werewolf, strong, animalistic, a fevered heat that calls to be tamed. There is something about the wild and the untamed, the breaking of the stallion, the intensity of the inner battle the werewolf for control.
Witches and Wizards are all about the harnessing of power. Their everyday persona's are usually small, meek, eccentric, and average. That is until they learn how to harness the power of nature, spirits and the forces of good and evil.

I am going to break off here…while I was writing this blog post we received a warning of tornado sirens here in Texas. I would just like to say for the record, I would take an earthquake over a freakin tornado any day of the week. Let me explain, with an earthquake it is usually (with Japan being the exception) seconds and then done. With a tornado, you don’t know when, how, if and what. Am I going to die because a cow lands on my roof? I mean seriously…most people are the opposite but this is me!

Well unfortunately all of this drama killed the mood, so we will pick up with this next week. Till then, consider which is your favorite and why. Can you guess mine?


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Monday, May 23, 2011

Talk is cheap, show me what you got!

Talk talk talk....too much talking in the bedroom is a pet peeve of mine. Don't get me wrong I am all about a little dirty talk or a few curses or swears when things get intense. But there is a limit to the amount of conversation that is acceptable foreplay in my mind.

DO DON'T TALK! That is the basic rule I go by. Don't ask me questions don't try to get me to direct the action. If I want to be in control and tell you what to do then I will put a leash around your neck and then we can play that way...which might be fun every once in a while but as a general rule, no not so much.

Is it just me? Do you like a lot of talk in bed?

Maybe its because I am so used to my instinct driven animal of a mate that I don't like it, Tarquin isn't much for words in or out of bed honestly, but damn I love him. The question came up the other day though and it got me thinking and so I experimented and decided I was right in my original assumption...

Talk is cheap, show me what you got!

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Rapture, is it?

If you’re reading this then you survived the rapture. Lucky you! As for me I’ve probably been carted of to that dark place where it’s hot and men walk around naked, hard muscles glistening with sweat.

 Yeah, which of us is lucky again?

 I’ve never been one to begrudge anyone their beliefs, or to view them differently because of it. Still, I can’t help but wonder about the person who made this prophesy/foretelling, or whatever they call it. Obviously this one hasn’t read his Bible lately. I say he because us women know better.

 And yes, I happen to know the Bible. I wasn’t always the corrupt, smut-writer you see before you. Well, I was, but I hid it quite well behind Sunday school and all the other church-related hoopla. I haven’t stepped into a church in quite some time. Do you think that factors into my reckoning at the rapture?

 Should it? Just because you aren’t in the physical place of worship, is your belief and faith any less real? Any less than those who practically live up in the building Sunday to Sunday?

 CAUTION: Bible quote ahead J “No one knows the day nor the hour…”

 To think yourself as important enough to predict that is useless and reckless and completely laughable.

 Of course all this is written before the predicted time and day, so should anything occur at then, I simply cross my hand over my chest and frown. “Lucky guess.” Either way I’m cool—naked men tend to mellow me out.

Friday, May 20, 2011

Zombies, Judgment day and the CDC?

Apparently tomorrow, May 21, 2011 between 12:noon and 3:00 PM is Judgment day and the end of the world is predicted exactly 5 months later on October 21, 2011. Yes, that specific.

Seriously…do you know many times the end has been predicted? And we are still here. Okay, let’s suppose that this time the end really is upon us…what would you do if you were left behind on J-day?

Here’s a hint…do not even think about taking up residency at my house. LOL

Obviously, if it is tomorrow, I will still be around and I will still be as protective of my property as I am today.

Indulging my government conspiracy theories got me thinking…I wonder of the CDC knew about this and prepared well in advance? Have you checked out their Zombie Apocalypse Blog?

Never Fear – CDC is Ready

Get a Kit, Make a Plan, Be Prepared

If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated. Not only would scientists be working to identify the cause and cure of the zombie outbreak, but CDC and other federal agencies would send medical teams and first responders to help those in affected areas (I will be volunteering the young nameless disease detectives for the field work).

Well, there you have it and remember, don’t get bitten, even if you don’t turn into a zombie, the medical teams will dissect you in the name of science.

Until next week, maybe…

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Erotic Review - Silhouette by Darren G Burton

I was in Florida last week on business, sorry I missed you guys! So for anyone who has been keeping up I recently took and Erotic Novel Challenge. This past weekend I started and finished,

Silhouette, Darren G Burton - Private detective and bodyguard, Ashlar Roman, is commissioned to protect Miss Universe contestant, Silhouette Havana, after an attempt on her life is made. With egos clashing from the moment they meet, the pair are thrust into a deadly world of betrayal and survival, where they learn some people are willing to win at any cost.

Thought I would this one, and it was not all what I expected. Very noir, dry and long, well it seemed long anyway. This is not to say it was not interesting. The premise and character wave was intense and carefully woven but the “attraction” between Ash and Silhouette was well, non-existent. There was a little too much focus on the mystery side and not enough on the romance. This is supposed to be hot steamy erotic romance, right? Yeah, no, sorry it’s not happening.
The author is gifted but needs to change genres or at least categorize it differently. Then at least we know what we are getting into.

Only two stars…sorry

Okay on to the next! Hard bodies on the cover, a steamy title, Yowza…hello…let me turn on the air-conditioning! And even a warning label.

Dream Machine, Jayne Rylon -The best dreams are made of naughty and spice.

Rebecca Williams is about to achieve her goal of graduating from a prestigious university and winning a coveted spot in her mentor's cutting-edge psychology practice. She just needs one more qualification: sexual experience. She never dreamed it would come at the hands of the man she's admired and wanted for six years. Dr. Kurt Foster.

Kurt, a brilliant psychologist in the field of sexual therapy, is a scientist to the core. Attraction and lust are nothing more than chemical reactions, in his clinical opinion. Love? It's just a figment of the imagination born of nature's directives. He's on the brink of proving it with a new machine that uncovers latent desires.

In short order, Becca's forbidden lust for her boss is exposed. As Kurt continues to enlighten her on the darker facets of her sexuality, the student unexpectedly becomes the teacher.

And suddenly Kurt is confronted with the irrefutable proof that love is so much more than a societal construction.

Warning: This book is only suitable for readers who are turned on by hot doctors engaging in sexual experiments, bondage, ménage a trois, exhibitionism, suspension, anal sex and other deviant behavior using mechanical stimulation devices they've invented to make your wildest dreams come true.

Will it have what it takes to keep my juices flowing? We shall see!


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TwitterLatest tweet: @pathunstrom A cult is giving up personal will to another. #MyWANA
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Monday, May 16, 2011

Forgiveness isn't my thing...

My wonderful author is working hard on #6 right now. She has informed me that she is somewhere around halfway done with this story and already thinking about #7 and #8 and beyond. But #6 has a lot to do with #4 which is Mating Call, the story of Lillian an Animal Elf who tried to have me executed and Henry a young werewolf from Tarquin's pack.

Now I have a lot of animosity toward Lillian though after hearing her story I was able to forgive a bit of what she tried to do to my family. And because of Paxton's council and all their rules I am bound to sit back and grumble about the wrongdoing.

I may never act on my hatred of Lillian but I will never forgive her I just don't have it in me to do that. For far too long I lived by the law of eye for an eye, or more accurately a head for an eye. She tried to have my mate and I executed I would have burned down her whole fucking colony if I'd had the chance.

But that was before...before Paxton's council which I try very hard to be supportive of even when it goes against every cell in my body to do so. My mouth waters for the taste of Lillian's blood...

Forgiveness may not be my thing but I know how to be loyal to my friends and I don't want to cause a rift in the council because of my bloodlust.

Sunday, May 15, 2011


I'm happy to announce my very first paranormal romance has been contracted by Total-E-Bound. No word yet on a release date, but here's the blurb!

They call her ‘The woman in white’, whisper ‘Death-Bringer’ with their last breath, but no one knows exactly what she is. Not even Voltaire herself. The deadly magic within her is a living thing, able to crush anyone and everything with a blink. Abandoning the blood-soaked world she’s used to, she seeks out the one constant in her tired life…the blue eyed wolf in her dreams. She’s ignored the wolf’s call for years, afraid to surrender, but danger haunts her mate. He needs her.

Wolf-shifter Blake Montez is in the middle of a war, battling the usurpers intent on taking over his territory. Unfamiliar magic hums in the air, unnoticed—it seems—by everyone but him. He finds the source already under his nose, in his home. The delicate woman in white knows things no one should know, and the heat simmering between them is like nothing he’s ever felt. His wolf recognizes her as his mate, but Blake isn’t sure he can trust her.
Voltaire sets out to prove herself but time is running out. Enemies are on the prowl, some foreseen, others remain cloaked in shadow. She and Blake team up, fighting side by side, but in the end Voltaire might be the biggest threat to their love.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Hot Damn!

I was finally able to log in to Blogger! And now that I’m here, I forgot what I was going to say…

Okay, let’s start with the good news…

The eagerly awaited, Boi Toi, will be released on Sunday, May 15, 2011 at eXtasy Books. Here’s a sneak preview of what you can expect:

When Julia, a power-femme, betrays McKenna, Lexi, pulls out all the stops to help heal McKenna’s broken heart. A party, a strap-on, cock worship and orgasm control is only the beginning of McKenna’s evening. Can Lexi convince her to become her new boi toi?

Lexi led me through the rooms on the main floor, explaining the significance of the furniture and the art, which was French contemporary, but bored me almost to tears. Luckily, I think she noticed my efforts in trying to look interested and upped the stakes. Each time we entered a room, occupied or not, she would grab my cock and rub it gently as she continued her history lesson. When we entered the unoccupied library, I grabbed her, bringing her close to me, but she took hold of my hands and stuck them in my pocket.
     “No touching, yet,” she warned and continued to talk about some damn French artist and how famous he was.
     “You’re driving me crazy,” I complained, leaving my hands where she put them.
     “You’re not a patient person, are you?” She cocked her head and smiled, slowly licking her lips, leaving them wet and shiny.
     “No—Yes,” I stammered and took a deep breath. “You’ve worked me up all night. I can’t stand it anymore. Show a girl some mercy.”
     “Okay,” she eagerly responded gesturing at my clothes. “Take them off.”
     “Here…now?” My voice cracked. I couldn’t believe what she suggested.
     “Yes,” she reassured me. “Here and now.”
     I peeked into the crowded hallway, noticing that any number of guests could easily walk in on us. “What if someone comes in?”
     “So?” She raised her brow in a questioning way. “What if they do?” She approached me and started unbuttoning my slacks.
     I pulled away. “No. I can’t do this,” I said securing the button in place.
     “Well, then, you’ll have to be patient.” She leaned into me and pressed her lips to my neck, gently laying kisses on my sensitive skin. “It’s not as if, I didn’t offer.”

And now for the great news: Hightower, book 6 – New Beginnings is at the editors! Yes, it’s done and you should have it soon. I am so excited about this story that I’m tempted to give you a sneak peak at it, but I’ve been warned not to get ahead of myself.

In the meantime, check back here or at my authors website for updated info.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Mother's Day

Every day should be Mother's Day! It was so wonderful thanks to my darling mate. He pampered me in bed all day. Catering to my every completely satisfying each and every one. By the time the sun went down I was sore in all the right places and had a belly full of the most delicious werewolf blood.

Could you ask for anything better from a mate or husband if you're human?

Then my daughter arrived with a night blooming cereus plant for my garden! I was so excited I have quite a garden during the summer of beautiful things that can be appreciated at night. This is one of my favorites. I will plant it in a day or two, have to find just the right spot.

I hope all you out there who have been a significant female influence on a child celebrated today because you are awesome and you deserve to have a day just for you.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

It's Mother's Day...Get Blindfolded!

She opened an eye. Grayson hovered in her office doorway, his eyes on some point above her head, a hesitant look on his face.
“What?” She kept rocking.
“I—ah, I wanted to apologize.” He entered and closed the door behind him before stopping in the middle of the room.
“Oh, yeah?” She leaned forward. “What for?” This promised to be good.
“For jumping to conclusions, for insinuating that, that—” He clasped his hands behind his back.
“That I’m a slut.”
His face turned red. “I was wrong and I apologize.”
“Are you sure?”
His eyes snapped up.
Lyric pushed back her chair and got to her feet. Predictably his eyes zeroed in on her chest. She walked toward him. “Are you sure I’m not a slut?” A frown creased his forehead and she continued. “You think I slept with your brother. That I use my body to get my way.”
Grayson shook his head. “I didn’t mean that. I was just—”
“Frustrated.” Directly in front of him now, she crossed her arms. “Yes, so you said.” She looked into his silver eyes. “And you know what? I believe you.”
Lyric closed the distance between them. She wanted to smell the delicious musk that clung to him. Grayson looked damn uncomfortable, his eyes guarded like he had no idea what to think. They stood chest to chest, but not touching.
She lowered her voice and spoke. “It has to be frustrating to think I had sex with your brother—betrayed you in the worst possible way—yet you still want me.” She followed the hypnotic movement of his Adam’s apple as he swallowed. “You still burn for me.”
Lyric met his stormy eyes. Twin slashes of color appeared on his cheekbones and she pushed further. She leaned into him, put her lips to his left ear and allowed her breath to caress him. His body went taut. Potent heat radiated from him to her, but he didn’t move.
She spoke again. “You dislike me, but most of all, you dislike yourself. For wanting me, needing me. For all the things you want to do to me.”

Now Available @ ARe:

Friday, May 6, 2011

What To Wear At A Vampire Ball

Help! You’re invited to a Vampire Ball and you’ve got no clue what to wear!

Don’t panic. Your Vampire advisory tells you the Do’s and Don’ts.

To let you relax a little — it’s considered very bad behavior to bite any guest on the dance floor. As long as you are dancing, your blood is safe, regardless if you stick to the rules below or don’t.

If you’re male:
You don’t have any problems. You can’t compete with the Vampire anatomy anyway, so there’s no point in showing off your manhood. A black tuxedo and a black, high-collar shirt, perhaps with a crimson bow tie are perfect. Complemented with black patent leather shoes, you’re ready to go. Ah — before I forget: no, you don’t need undies. If you think you can risk following an open invitation — see also the notes on the female dress code below — you needn’t waste time.

If you’re female:
You’ve got ample choice, and that’s the problem. Almost anything that would be appropriate for a Saturday evening in town is good for a Vampire Ball, too, and more. However, there’s a secret dress code that you better should know before you trigger undesired effects.

For example, you could wear your birthday suit or body painting, both bear about the same meaning, which is — “I want to have public sex all night on or off the dance floor.”

To a lesser degree, showing off your pubes means you want to have sex all night but not necessarily in public. And if you only show your rosy buttocks you don’t even care to know your partner’s name, you’ll lean forward anytime you feel the touch of a firm erection.

If you don’t want total debauchery, you’ll wear at least a cocktail dress. This means you’re inclined for frivolous fun but would like to be politely talked and danced into it. Or you go in a ball gown and reserve the right to turn down any courteous requests. So, yes, you can go to a ball just for dancing.

Baring your cleavage is okay, hiding it will do as well. However, as a mortal you might want to attract looks to your boobs rather than elsewhere. A “nipple slip” is nothing to worry about, however you may appear weak if you nervously readjust your wardrobe malfunction. Rather smile and ignore it!

So why would you want to advertise your assets? Because you don’t want Vampires staring at your throat, contemplating the fresh blood pulsating through your jugular veins — got me? — nor at your delicate thigh skin above the stayups. You know that’s an alternate spot for a bite, do you? If not, re-read my previous blog entry on safer sex.

If you find a dress that covers your neck, that may be your first choice, because hiding your throat is another secret code saying “don’t bite tonight”. There’s one exception — being nude with only the throat covered means "rape me and bite me". Beware!

Now you think you play safe and wear stockings instead of stayups? Sorry, you can’t. Because wearing panties or stockings would make you appear weak and shy, thus attracting the Vampire community’s curiosity and bloodlust. If you behave like a victim, you will become a victim. If you just don’t trust your stayups to stay up, either wear a garter belt or do without, both are acceptable.

Side note One to women: Does this make you feel horny? Don’t worry, the smell of pussy juice is socially acceptable.

Side note Two to men: Would you like to sneak into a Vampire Ball just for some up skirt peeks? Poor bastard, you’ll have lost your blood within the hour.

Basically all colors are fine. You’ll see yellow, green, gold, blue, pink, turquoise, orange, gold and silver in all hues and combinations with no specific meaning. There are three notable exceptions.

White, of course, is the color of innocence. A long white ball gown would mean you’re still free — not the signal you want to send to your Vampire friend, do you?

On the opposite, black means you have an ongoing partnership and are not interested in a change. You may still be looking for sex, but only tonight.

Avoid anything red, especially crimson, at all cost, even with any other guest courting you. This color, with few exceptions, indicates the desire to exchange blood.

All three colors’ meaning may further be underlined by the cut - I’m sure you can guess yourself what a white, black or crimson cocktail dress tells other Vampires, can you?

And one question — what’s the very worst combination you could wear as a mortal on a Vampire ball? I’ll give the answer next time.

It goes without saying — but I’ll do anyway — that you can’t wear anything but high heels. Even if you’ve made up your mind for nude look, going barefoot is not a valid option, and even Texan Vampires won’t come in cowboy boots. Unless you’re tall as a basket ball player, they shouldn’t be less than two inches high. If necessary, practice walking in them!

Short or long, messy, curled or straight - it doesn’t matter. Even crimson red is okay, as the rule mentioned above doesn’t apply to natural hair. (That means, if you don’t have red hair, don’t make it red.) If you’re risk-averse, don’t let your hair tips tease your throat or your thighs.

Lips, fingernails, toenails painted crimson may lead to a fatal misunderstanding, other hues of red are okay. While Vampires may feel the need to soften their pale complexion, everything from natural to body paint will do. Obtrusive perfumes are frowned upon, while natural body flavours are welcome. Vampires like to be able to smell if you’re ready for them — or if you already had some fun.

Your friend might surprise you with some expensive-looking jewelry — be sure if it looks expensive it IS expensive, and maybe some centuries old. But if not, don’t be disappointed. YOU are the most precious jewel. You’ve made an immortal creature fall in love with a mortal.

Until next time.
Don't miss my adventures. Collect them all at eXtasy Books

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Knight of Cups - Backlash

In the grip of fate there is no escape

They were worlds apart, drawn together by an undeniable passion. Ripped apart by fear, they ran from each other and now struggle to stand alone. Tragedy descends, and they are pulled together in search of a killer.

Kate returns to Dallas in search of Mike's killer. Within hours of her arrival, events quickly spin out of control. Jack struggles to keep his distance, but when Kate becomes a suspect, his instincts take over and he rushes to her defense. As danger looms, all of the reasons they walked away from each other disappear, leaving the passionate fire that brought them together.

Unknown forces set their sights on Jack and Kate, and the pair is forced to run or become the latest in a long line of victims. In a desperate search for the truth behind Mike's murder, they fight their way through the lies, discovering that not all is as it seems.


"Kate, wait up!" She turned toward Andy's voice. Her shoulders and back ached. She wanted to curl into a ball and sleep. Close her eyes and ignore her insides ripping themselves apart. She had gotten little to no sleep lying awake second-guessing her decision to meet Jack and then running from him. "Did you sleep with him?"

The comment hit her like a slap in the face. "What?"

"I need you to tell me what's really going on, Kate." His eyes darted through her and she lost her breath. "Were you sleeping with Mike?"

"Are you crazy, how can you even ask me that?"

"I know…I know it sounds crazy but when you got back…" Kate began to piece it together. He had noticed she was out of sorts when she got back from Texas and automatically assumed that she was upset by something Mike had done. "Just tell me the truth, Kate."

"Andy--" His hand clench around her upper arms.

"Just tell me the truth! Tell me you aren't covering for him."

"I'm not!" She broke out of his grasp and took a step back. "There was nothing between us besides friendship. He was like a father to me, Andy. You know that! What the hell is going on?"


"Nothing? Well nothing has apparently made me a suspect."Andy's face fell and he turned away from her. "So what, they think I was sleeping with Mike and that I know where the DiAvex plans are?" Andy's eyes shot up and she saw shock. "Not that it means anything, but I wasn't and I don't, but I may have a lead on where they went."
"This is so much bigger than we thought. Kate, you need to leave this whole thing alone. Promise me you'll leave it be."

"You know I can't do that. There are too many people involved now."

"You mean Jack Tucker?"

"What about Jack Tucker?"

"You tell me. That was a pretty heated conversation you two were having yesterday in the back alley of the Stockyards."

"You had me followed?"

"That's not the point."

"Oh, but I really think it is."

"Oh I get it, so you were screwing the DJ, and the boss," he said, ice in his eyes.

"You sure do get around don't you?"

"Screw you!"

"Seems I wasn't on the list, sorry. She turned away and he grabbed her by the arm again. "What the hell do you think you are doing?"

"My job, Andy, I am trying to find the truth!" She yanked her arm out of his grasp and walked away. The hallway in front of the theater was packed with people and she made her way through until she saw some familiar faces. She took shelter in the familiarity of her co-workers until they filed into the theater.

The service was beautiful and when Jack rose to the podium, her breath caught in her chest. Her heart pulled at her and she knew she needed to talk to him.

She was surrounded by suits, colleagues and friends all offering support and sympathy to each other. She nodded and smiled with each offering but the heaviness in her stomach began to grow. She eyed Melissa to her right and excused herself from the small group. The always elegant woman was fiddling with her purse and Kate waited until she finished."Hi, Melissa."

"Kate, hi sweetheart, it is so good to see you," Melissa walked over and embraced her affectionately. "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay. How are you and Dan?"

"Hanging in there, I just keep telling myself it's almost over."

"Me too."

"Are you looking for Jack?"

"Yeah, I am."

"He is moving the arrangements into the back for tomorrow's service." She pointed to a set of doors on the opposite side of the theater.


"Kate," Melissa called to her and Kate turned back. "We're glad your back."

Kate appreciated the comment, and smiled at Melissa in thanks before she moved toward the door. She wasn't sure what to expect when she saw him, but she was honest enough to admit that she wanted to see him. She needed to see him right now. The pulling in her chest was worsening and she felt like a dam ready to break with no safe place to go.

She passed through the double doors, and moved through the dark hallway. She came to a set of doors on the right. She inhaled a deep breath, turned the corner, and opened the door. The room lay out before her, and she looked around for any sign of Jack. Her eyes stopped. A man and woman were tightly entwined and Kate stepped back offering them some privacy. His brown hair was just like Jack's…Kate's breath refused to release itself from her lungs when her brain caught up. She moved out of the doorway and to the right. She ducked into a darkened corner, her heart pounding uncontrolled as she pushed away the threatening emotion in her throat. He called after her and the clang of opening doors bounced off the walls. His voice started loud and then faded as the distance between them increased. Kate stood flattened against the wall. Once she was sure he was gone, she moved, debating the best hope for a quick exit.

"Kate." She turned, seeing a woman glaring back at her. She recognized her but couldn't place the name. The woman's stance, while small, was set in attack mode and Kate wondered why. "Haven't you done enough?"

"Excuse me?" Kate straightened her back.

"He was fine you know. He was fine without you, and now you come back and send him into a spiral of confusion and hell."

"I'm sorry, do I know you?"

"Yeah we met briefly at the station…"

"Elisa, Mike's assistant," Kate said aloud as she ran through her memory about the woman.

Twenty-five, graduate of Orange Coast, single, lived alone, no record and worked for Mike for the past six months or so. Kate remembered the girl as being mousy and shy. She wasn't sure where this alternate persona had arrived from, but Kate didn't like it. It meant she was hiding something.

"Yeah not that you ever noticed."

"I noticed. I apologize I didn't immediately recognize you. It's been a long day."

"Leave him alone. He doesn't want to see you anymore. You've hurt him enough."

"Jack makes his own decisions."

"So let him make them." The woman's words blazed fury which was contradictory to her cool eyes. "You keep showing up! Every time he thinks he has his head on straight, you walk in and confuse him again. You can't give him what he needs, Kate. We both know that."

Kate gulped back her own fears, trying not to let the words she had spoken so many times haunt her now. "Your life is dangerous. Jesus, look what's happened since you came into his life! There has been nothing but lies and death. Let him go. Let him go before you destroy so much there is nothing left!"

Kate stood in silence and Elisa ceased her scolding. Kate moved past her, leaving her alone in the hallway. It took her a moment to push the woman's words out of her mind. Once she had, she proceeded to look for a back exit. Damn him. 

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Monday, May 2, 2011


Sorry I missed last week, sometimes I just need a break, like everyone else I suppose. Tarquin and I took a little vacation, it was time with my mate always is. So I missed talking of Earth Day, Easter and Arbor Day...seriously how many holidays can humans squeeze into one month? And now May Day too!

What is the human obsession with holidays? Why do they feel the need to dedicate days specifically to things like being good to the earth or loving trees? ....seriously, trees? I get, more than humans I am sure, that it is important to take care of the earth and trees but a day dedicated to that, come on now we are just grasping at straws here. Every day you should care, one day a year won't make one little difference.

Does the one day serve a purpose though, does it give humans a false sense of goodness? Oh yes I celebrated Earth day, I rode the bus or I celebrated Arbor day I planted a tree...

I just don't get it, can anyone explain this obsession with holidays to me?

Sunday, May 1, 2011


It’s been years since physical contact, yet your touch lingers. I lay in bed at night, eyes on the ceiling, barely seeing as I recall your face. Your eyes. It’s been years, but I still feel your gaze caressing me, holding me captive. Time and distance hasn’t erased your memory, it only makes me yearn more, pine for what could have been.

What should have been.

You should be here beside me, but he’s there instead. Should be your heat warming me at night. Why aren’t you the one curling my toes, making me scream? But it’s been years. And you’re gone. Instead he’s here, taking your place. And I’m here, marking time.

If we knew back then where we’d be today, would you still have given me your heart? Would you still have taken mine? Held it so tightly, never giving it back? If we’d known you’d be gone from me, would we have finished before ever starting?

Do I cross your mind at night? Do you lie in bed, eyes on the ceiling, and recall my face? My eyes? Are you wishing upon the same star that I’m the one beside you instead of her, touching you, heating you up?       

It’s been years and my chest aches. It’s hollow, you see. Only what-ifs reside where my heart used to be. Only regrets. I wish upon that star you’ll return to me. Return that heart you stole, return me to the land of the living. And loving.

But it’s been years.

*Inspired by Blindfold Me, available now.

***Thirteen years ago, Lyric Benson's boyfriend accused her of sleeping with his older brother then disappeared. She never stopped caring, never stopped hoping. Now, all these years later, Lyric is stunned to discover the new owner of her company is one Grayson St. Clair, who never forgot or forgave her transgression.

Grayson wants nothing to do with someone he thinks hurt him so deeply. He can't let go of the past and he can't trust Lyric. It doesn't help matters that while on her watch, the Masonry company she oversaw was hacked into and the company's top secret client list accessed. Reluctantly, Lyric and Grayson team up to find the culprit, with Grayson denying their blossoming feelings at every turn. But when his brother appears, secrets in tow, Grayson will have to choose: live in the past or move on with Lyric.