Friday, August 31, 2012

Ten Reasons Why Vampires Don’t Like Dragons

The last months, since I started posting on this board, I’ve learned a lot about Vampires, and I shared it with you. I hope you enjoyed it, but I’ve almost exhausted my sources, and the only way to gain more insight on Vampire life for me would be to become a Vampire myself.

I’m not all too eager to do that. Instead, let me start talking about my favorite subject, and let me start by relating it to the subject with which we learned to know each other.

Vampires aren’t fond of Dragons. In fact, they try to avoid any contact, and they have good reasons. Let me list just the most important ones:

  1. Dragons don’t agree with the superiority of the Vampire race. They won’t bow to an Elder Vampire.
  2. Dragons aren’t bothered by darkness. They can see, hear and smell a Vampire by day and night, and Dragons aren’t limited in their fighting abilities either.
  3. Dragons can’t be bitten. Their scales are a good protection against Vampire bites.
  4. Dragons can’t be hypnotized, at least not by Vampires. A virgin might help to distract them for a while – if you can find one.
  5. Dragons have an extremely well-working memory. They can hold their grudges against a Vampire for centuries. If a Dragon decides to hunt a Vampire down, the result is predictable.
  6. Dragon fire reliably roasts a Vampire beyond hope for resurrection, only it works quicker than sunlight – a small relief. Vampire flesh will be turned to plasma like anything else by a flame of twelve hundred Kelvin, as I already mentioned in my “Ten Unusual Ways To Kill A Vampire.”
  7. Dragons are faster than Vampires, if they want to be. Usually a Dragon is happy when a Vampire decides to leave, but if the Dragon is really annoyed, he might decide to come after the Vampire. There’s hardly any place where a Vampire can hide from a Dragon’s fiery breath.
  8. If the Dragon doesn’t right away roast the Vampire, he (or she) may decide to take the Vampire for a flight – either until dawn, or to drop the unlucky victim into a hot volcano.
  9. Dragons are easily annoyed by molesting their human protégés. Unluckily, you can’t tell if a human community has to be regarded as protected by a Dragon until you’ve bitten one of them – whereupon the Dragon may decide to eradicate any future threat.
  10. If their fire wasn’t bad enough, somehow their claws can serve the same purpose as a wooden spike.

You see, there’s not exactly a foundation for peaceful co-existence.
Next time I’ll elaborate on the Dragons’ point of view.


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